It all started a few years after the pandemic. I had been teaching virtually for quite a while and between the isolation and the dwindling demand, I was itching to find something new. I looked around briefly, and like a miracle made just for me, I found the perfect position. Soon, I was working in my dream job running the educational preschool program at a local gymnastics center. It was a small program with only a few students and a half day schedule. The pay was good, my coworkers were amazing, my students were wonderful, and I felt fulfilled in the work I was doing. I woke up everyday excited to go to work. It was truly the perfect position.
When I was hired, I told the owner about my desire to start a family. I was about to get married to man of my dreams, and having always wanted to be a mom, I was eager to get pregnant. After my wedding, my husband and I wasted no time getting started. We immediately started trying to conceive, and again I discussed with my boss my dream of becoming a mother. Upon hearing that I was trying to get pregnant, my boss assured me that my job would be safe. She promised to work with me as much as I needed throughout the process of pregnancy and early maternity. I once again felt that I had truly found the perfect job. I confidently continued working towards becoming a mother, and after a few months of trying to conceive, I started to feel funny. I had a gut feeling that my dream of becoming a mother was finally coming true! After confiding in my coworkers, who had quickly become some of my best friends, I took a pregnancy test right there at the gym. Surrounded by the love and support of these amazing women, I was elated to learn that my instincts were right. I was finally pregnant!
Everyone at the gym was ecstatic, everyone except for my boss. After hearing the news, the tone in our relationship slowly started to change. Earlier in the year I had been assured that when I became pregnant, my job would be safe, but I soon learned this would not be the case. My boss announced her change in attitude to me with a list of conditions, a lecture about my future appearance, and a warning that I would likely not be able to continue working throughout my pregnancy. Though I was primarily a preschool teacher, and spent most of my time in the classroom not the gym, she explained that I would not be expected to uphold the duties of my job and would be asked to take a break from my position in the coming months. She claimed that I was not being fired because she “wouldn’t do that,” but it was very clear that the job security I was promised did not actually exist. Panicked, stressed, and full of new pregnancy hormones, I began frantically searching for alternative streams of income. I checked out part time jobs, remote work, gig work, anything and everything I could think of, but nothing seemed right. Finally and begrudgingly, I began to look for a new job.
When I first began my search, I stumbled upon an opportunity that seemed too good to be true. A director position at another gym with great pay and fantastic benefits was open in a town very close to where my mother lived. It was a Sunday afternoon when I sent in my application and resume for this amazing position again feeling like I stumbled upon a miracle made just for me. The next morning, I popped into the office at the gym to inform my boss about the opportunity. I explained that my husband and I had considered the move a few times, and that the job was just too good to pass up. I assured her that no plan had been made, and that I planned to stay in my current position if I did not get this opportunity, which was a upward move within the company we worked for. I thought my boss would be supportive of this endeavor. She frequently claimed to have the backs of her employees and want the best for us all. Looking back, this was a naive assumption. She had already shown me who she really was. I should have known better than to expect anything other than the response I got.
My boss looked down her nose at me with narrow eyes, and said that I should never have applied to the open job without first asking her permission. Despite my sending in the application less than 24 hours prior to this conversation, on a Sunday of all days, she had already been contacted about a reference for me and my job performance, and she was angry. She did not specifically say she had given me a bad review, but it was clear she had chosen not to share the amazing feedback of the many parents, students, and peers that I had worked with or the outstanding progress the program had made under my leadership. She claimed that this would be a good learning experience for me, and then promptly fired me. I was allowed to finish out the month, say my goodbyes, and depart gracefully from the program, but I would not be welcome back for the upcoming school year. Though the official reasoning for my unemployment status was the choice to attempt career advancement in a situation where I felt I had little job security, I have always felt that the real reason I was let go was my pregnancy. Though I had many fears as I inched closer to motherhood, the loss of my career had not been on the list of things I was expecting, and it was truly a frustrating, and heartbreaking situation to find myself in at 13 weeks pregnant.
And that is the unexpected and outrageous but unfortunately true story of how in the year 2024, in a early childhood development center, with an all female staff and a boss with two children of her own, I was fired being nothing more than a woman. Though we hear in the media that we live in an age of feminism with glass ceilings shattering all around us, my experience has taught me that at it’s core our society will always put the working mother at a disadvantage. Her body will always be seen as a liability not a strength. Her personal goals will always be viewed as improper priorities. Her efforts will always remain unnoticed. Perhaps this is the nature of being a woman. Perhaps this is the downside of being a mother. Perhaps this is the downfall of our world, but this will not stop me. Since my departure from the workforce, I have found new purpose in the support of my family. I have found fulfillment in the beautiful journey of becoming a mother, and as I continue down the trail of my life, I am looking forward to the many adventures that lay ahead. Teaching was a dream job, but being a mother is my true dream.
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